Time to resurect this blog and really commit to writing out my thoughts and feelings and just sharing daily life. Even if no one ever sees it but me.
So much has happened since I last posted here so I will bullet point it.
Hubby has changed trucking companies a few times.
Levi is living with us permanently and I am raising him. His mom, her husband and Laikyn are living separately across the state.
During COVID (2020) Hubby bought his own truck with a SBA loan that he got. Also during COVID we took 3 of the grands (Levi, Tru and Uriah) and made a cross country trip to Utah to visit my parents, brother and Jasmin.
I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes.
The end of 2021 I started to get very sick but we did not know why.
The beginning of 2022 we moved my parents across country from Utah to Georgia.
They lived with us for about 3 months. They finally purchased a home in Douglas Georgia
Due to my being sick hubby was coming home and staying home longer than normal as he was worried about me.
The beginning of May 2022 I woke one morning with a severe headache. So bad I could not see when I opened my eyes and when I tried to open them the pain was too intense. Destinee took me to the ER where they thought I had a migraine. They also ran blood tests and at that time found that my hemoglobin was a 2.4. The dr told us that he admits people to the ICU when their hemoglobin reaches a 8 and he did not know how I was still alive. They gave me 2 units of blood at our local hospital and then transferred me to a larger hospital in Savannah Georgia. I spent 4 days there and received 3 more units of blood.
That was enough to scare me. I had to get my health in check quickly!!
I have lost 108 lbs since that hospital stay. I am eating healthier and am increasing my movement and excercise daily. I still have a long way to go but I am super proud of myself and am very motivated to get where I want to be.
September 2022 we realized we were losing our asses with this truck. Fuel costs are high. Freight is cheap. Repairs are killing us. We made the decision to sell the truck. It has sold and as of today we are waiting for the check to clear the bank. Once that happens we will pay some past due debts. Clear up some of our smaller weekly bills and see if we can get ourselves back on track financially. Its going to take some work but I know we can get there.
During this period of illness and financial struggles I have really begun struggling with my faith. I dont know how to fix it but I am trying. I say every week that I am comitted to going to church but then Sunday or even Wednesday comes and I find some excuse to just get out of it. I am not praying as much and when I do need to pray I feel like I am not worthy of praying because why would he listen to me anyhow when I am not being obedient and faithful. I wish I had someone I could talk to about this but I dont really. When I try to talk to hubby he always says "well maybe you need to talk to the pastor". And maybe I should but I just dont think I am that comfortable in speaking with him about that. I guess I will just keep plugging forward. Maybe one day the desire will override all the other and I will get back to where I desire to be.
Anyhow that is it for now..
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